Is It Really That Bad?


When something unexpectedly goes awry, our monkey minds have the tendency
to frame it in a stuck negative position… as if it will always be that way!  Crazy huh?

Take for instant food poisoning or strep throat. It is an event with a clear time signature. But in the throws of feeling horrible, our thoughts hunker down into a position that our life is horrible. We extrapolate and futurize, overlaying our ill feelings onto EVERYTHING.

Catch yourself.

Learn how to discern what is really happening.

It is alright and even helpful to acknowledge what is happening such as,  “in this moment I am experiencing extreme discomfort”, but be aware of the key phrase  “in this moment.”

Remind the monkeys gone amok in your brain this is not a permanent position, just an event, and it too shall pass. It truly is a case of noticing “what is.” Unless you are really committed to creating a crappy life, the “oh everything is forever horrible” only promotes cascading negative thoughts that are useless and waste of energy.

As a big footnote: This is why a daily meditation practice is so helpful. You are creating neural pathways of clarity, calm, and strength that will assist you later on when the monkeys begin to rattle the cage so things don’t get out of hand.

always love,

What Kind Of Old Junk Are You Framing?


If you lived alone in the forest or a cave long enough, you would have little use for what others thought of you. Your appearance (hair/clothes) would not matter. Your status, Facebook likes, net worth, kind of car you owned, etc. would be meaningless. So would subjective reflections such as “am I worthy?” or “what do they think of me?” All of that would eventually fall away.

Access your intuitive self:

Open up your heart center:

Notice your breath:

Your thoughts would be centered on immediate needs of food, shelter, water, and safety. If an impending storm loomed, you would focus on gathering berries to ensure you had something to eat the next day. If you didn’t gather enough, you would make a mental note for the next time a similar situation occurred.

You are born with a clear mind, an empty box. It was void of self-created beliefs, stories, and patterns. As you grow up, you selectively filtered and categorized meaning based on the depth of the emotional impact. You created meaning. Everything that followed was built upon the previous with variations and mutations. Naturally you can see how the input affects the outputs. How powerfully our childhood experiences are.

As an adult, thoughts and actions are framed by the subconscious. Until we sort it out, we’ll be ruled by other people’s stories and fears instead of one’s own inner guidance. One of the keys to happiness is understanding your subconscious framing and dismantling it.

A good place to start is assume everything is an illusion. It is all made up out of thin air and meaning is subjective. Train your mind to expand rather then contract. The following are several direct action steps to start incorporating into your daily life:

– Strengthen your neural wiring by consciously creating positive thoughts and experiences. (Remember, your brain can’t distinguish between a put-on smile and the real thing.)

– Notice what is the previous thought before the anxiety, nervousness, or fear arises. Delve into that truth. There are only rare instances that a real tiger, lion, or bear is in your presence and can harm you.

– Remind your central nervous system you are safe and taken care of by writing down five gratitudes per day.

– Increase your appreciation of others. This will open your heart center and connect you deeply to others.

– Daily meditation. 20 minutes. It can be continuous or 20 individual one minute sessions. There is no “right way” to meditate. Just sit quietly and you’ll naturally discover the pathway.

– Notice your breathing. Breathe deep from your abdomen instead of your chest.

– Pick someone who is doing what you are inhibited to do and use their playbook. Take the emotion out and literally copy them.

always love,