The Great Soaring 'What If?'

Writers have a technique to expand the possibilities of a story by asking the question "What If?" It will instantly crowbar open the door to infinite flow. Your logical mind will release and previously un-thought-of scenarios will magically appear.

When we are stuck on a problem or in an argument, we get hunkered down on a fixed position. Einstein espoused the wonderful advice: "You can't solve a problem from the position you created it." Put another way by Buddhist monk Mingyur Rinpoche: "When we become fixed in our perceptions we lose our ability to fly."

Imagine you are in a heated exchange with your beloved over some bills not getting paid. What will be the net result of the "he said, she said" cycle of blame, shame, criticism, projection? You'll probably both go to bed upset without a clear resolution.

What if one of you instead asked: "What if we tied a 4-foot piece of string connecting our ankles and walked around the block right now?" Out the door on the walk you go. Naturally, to be successful you'll have to sync your walking. You are together — just like in your relationship. Do you want arguing together or loving together?

Very quickly you'll realize the absurdity of the entire disagreement and instead of bickering, you'll arrive at an equitable loving solution. I hope you do.